


The Struggle of Romantic Endeavors

by fruit_loops



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, First Dates, Fluff, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Romance, troy being adorable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:09:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26209219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fruit_loops/pseuds/fruit_loops
Summary: Five times Troy let fear get the best of him with Abed, and the one time he didn't.
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Comments: 11
Kudos: 155





	The Struggle of Romantic Endeavors

**Author's Note:**

> spoiler for how i met your mother if you havent watched the sandcastles in the sand episode in season 3. if you still wanna read it skip number 2; as always italics are thoughts and thank you for reading you're amazing *abed's smile and thumbs up*

Troy doesn't really know for sure when it started. When he started viewing Abed as more than a friend, as more than just a fellow study group member and Spanish classmate. One day, Troy just looked up and realized how kissable his lips were, and then realized that best friends do not think that way about each other. At first, he tried to brush it off, thinking that his friendship with Abed was so special that it defied the bounds of normal friendship rules. So what if he wanted to kiss Abed? Or stare deeply into his soulful eyes? Or push him into the couch and sneak his hands under his clothes, feeling the soft skin underneath those layers, before quickly taking them off along with his and then trailing his lips down--. _Yeah, these are definitely not platonic thoughts_. He didn't know how long he'd last though. How long he would be able to keep the secret before everything in him came exploding out and laid bare like one of those splatter paintings. Except with less color. And probably more crying.

It didn't explain the war happening inside of him though; two sides fighting for control. Convention and romance, battling it out, both sides wanting to come out on top. It was causing his brain to cry a lot. Troy was conflicted. On one hand, he didn't want to lose what he had with Abed, didn't want to lose the best friendship he's ever had. Abed makes everyday feel like a golden ticket to Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, or some other movie reference that shows how completely awesome he is. But what if things change between them if he tells Abed he loves him, or another word strong enough to describe his perpetual love for him? The truth is, there is no word. There's no word powerful enough to convey his all-consuming and intoxicating love for Abed. That's the other side fighting for survival: romance. He knows the risks, but the rewards far outweigh anything he's ever experienced in his life. The possibility that Abed Nadir loves him back? It's too much to take. So, he's going to ask him out. He's going to do it. He's actually, going to seriously do it.

5.

He couldn't do it. When he pulled Abed to the side at the end of the study group session with tickets to the newest romantic comedy, _I Love You, Man_ , he thought he was making the situation as clear as possible. _I mean, it's in the title of the movie!_

Apparently not though, when Abed asked if he could invite Annie as well.

"Hey bud, wanna watch _I Love You, Man_ in the theaters, today? It's at 8 tonight. If you come I'll pay for snacks."

"Sure! But is it okay if we invite Annie? I owe her a movie after I talked through the entire viewing of Citizen Kane."

 _no, no, no, no, no, no, no_. "Yeah, that's fine." Okay maybe that last part was kind of his fault. 

"Great. Can't wait." Abed said, tilting his head and pointing a finger towards Troy.

"Yep, can't wait." He turned and rushed out of the library, making sure Abed didn't see the frown forming on his face.

4.

It took a lot of pleads and empty promises for the student body to convince the Dean to host another STD fair. Of course though, this time he bought regular condoms instead of the printed ones. He didn't want another repeat of last year. The Dean shuddered at the thought of it.

Troy was excited for the fair. Or as excited as one could be about a fair whose main goal was to spread awareness of sexually-transmitted diseases. It didn't help matters that the Dean was standing at the door of the entrance and personally giving everyone who entered and left the building a goodie bag filled with condoms. It did help though that he was here with Abed and was determined to show his love for him in the most timeless way possible: winning him a lot of huge stuffed animals.

Turns out though, that Troy sucked at carnival games.

He scowled as he wasted another dollar trying to toss the stupid, plastic ring onto an empty bottle. It wasn't until his 7th attempt at it that he won a stuffed frog. 

"Here." Troy said as he gave the tiny frog to Abed. "This is for you." He couldn't help the blush creeping up his cheeks. 

Abed took the doll and examined it, turning it upside down and running his fingers over the smooth material. "Thank you." He looked up at Troy, meeting his eyes with a small curve of his lip. "Is this why you were trying so hard at the games? To win me this prize? Is this like one of those classic lover tropes, where person A tries too hard and wastes a lot of money trying to win a huge stuffed bear for person B?" 

Troy panicked, the fear and anxiety manifesting itself again. In a flash, he realized what would happen if he said yes and the possibility of losing his friend slapped him across the face. "What? Pshaw! Nah man, I just felt bad for turning everything into a competition at the last STD fair so I thought I would make it up to you for this one." He couldn't meet his eyes. Friends don't lie to each other and he knew that if he looked up, Abed could see right through him.

If he looked up though, he would've saw the disappointment in Abed's eyes.

3.

"Can I show you something?" Troy asked Abed when they entered the cafeteria. Abed was just about to go on line when Troy took his hand with a hopeful smile on his face. Holding hands wasn't unusual for them. Compared to everything they did, holding hands was at the bottom of the unusual list. Even though Abed was never the one who initiated the contact, he didn't mind it when Troy took his hand during the climax of a scary movie or when he was feeling especially sad. He liked it, liked the solidity of Troy's hands, the way he would squeeze his to show that he was there and that everything was okay. Abed knew that it was also an act of vulnerability. The blush in his cheeks and the softness of his eyes whenever he took his hand showed Abed that this small act meant the world to Troy. So whenever Troy slipped his hand into his, Abed always made sure to give him a small smile and a squeeze to show that this was okay. And if it wasn't, if it was one of those no-touch days, he would carefully take his hand out, but still give Troy that same smile to show that they were alright. So when Troy slipped his hand into Abed's, he turned to face him, giving him that sweet smile and a squeeze of his hand.

"Okay."

"Follow me, please." Troy beamed at him, before swiftly walking out of the cafeteria, still holding Abed's hand and leading him out onto the campus grounds. It was a perfect day. The sun was shining, basking them in a warm glow while a light breeze filled the air, cooling them down from the bright sunshine. The grounds were also almost deserted, with everyone either in detention from a riot (led by Britta) caused by the cancellation of dairy products in the lunch meals or on a frisbee tournament in the town next over. 

Troy had the most perfect date planned out. He set up a blanket underneath the big tree in the middle of the lawn and packed a picnic basket with Abed's favorite foods, buttered pasta and special drink. He was quite proud of himself for coming up with such a flawless idea. He even cooked all the food and put it in a thermal lunchbox! He had his whole declaration of love planned out with rose petals surrounding the blanket to let Abed know for sure, that this was a date. Then I don't know, maybe they would kiss? If Abed was up for it and if the date went perfectly. Which it will. 

He led Abed to the picnic blanket, nervous, but hopeful. He even saw another couple sitting on the bench which was definitely a good sign from the universe. And _oh, they stopped holding hands. Oh, she's telling him something and he's frowning. OH MY GOD HE'S CRYING DID THEY JUST BREAK UP? NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE._ Feeling frazzled, a wave of doubt rushed through him, pushing out that hopeful feeling and replacing it with nothing but anxiety and panic. It all just dawned on Troy really fast, that if he showed Abed his perfect picnic date, there was a possibility that he was going to reject him, and he wasn't ready for that. Wasn't ready for Abed to stop being his friend, stop building forts with him, stop giving him that gentle smile whenever he took his hand. And _oh my god what am I doing I'm not ready for this fuck fuck fuck._

Without realizing it, Troy stopped dead in his tracks, just staring at the couple with wide, fearful eyes. He had been standing there for several seconds until Abed's concerned face peered into view. "Troy? Are you okay? What did you want to show me?"

"Oh, um, yeah, it's not far from here."

Troy started walking off in the direction they came from, still holding Abed's hand, but this time squeezing it as if Abed was going to let go any minute now. "Ta-da" Troy announced feebly.

"Troy, this is the cafeteria." Abed said, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah! That's what I wanted to show you! The cafeteria!" Troy said, wincing at his own words. He was a terrible liar. He had let his feet take control while his mind was occupied, and his feet led them right where they started.

Abed, fully knowing that Troy was lying, decided not to pursue the issue further, seeing Troy's panicked face. _Maybe the break-up scared him. But what did it scare him of?_ Abed shrugged. He knew everything was going to come out eventually. Especially because Troy was terrible at hiding secrets and had a habit of thinking out loud. It was going to be okay.

"Let's get a table."

Troy gave an audible sigh before replying with a, "Sure."

2\. 

Troy was sitting lazily on the couch in Abed's dorm with his back slouched and his head propped up by his hand. Abed was sitting on the other side of the couch with his head resting on the back pillows. While they would usually be snuggled up to one another, the room was too hot for cuddling on account of Abed's air conditioner being broken and maintenance yet to fix it. They were watching How I Met Your Mother, specifically Sandcastles in the Sand. Troy loved How I Met Your Mother while Abed tolerated it. Troy loved the romance and comedy it brought while Abed criticized its use of the laugh track. He always watched it whenever Troy wanted to though. The truth was he didn't mind it all that much.

Troy was dozing off because he had already seen this episode. So had Abed, but he put it on anyway. After a long night of studying and an even longer night of playing pirates, a comfort episode was what they needed. They actually put on "Slapsgiving", but neither had reached for the remote when the next episode played.

Seven episodes (and three bags of chips) later, Troy was drifting off to sleep when a particular scene startled him awake. Barney and Robin, a pair of best friends, were making out on her couch, the TV before them long forgotten. Involuntarily, Troy looked up at Abed, only to find his big brown eyes boring into his. Abed's pupils were blown, with his lips parted ever so slightly. It was just him and Abed, on his couch, with the TV long forgotten. The room felt even hotter than usual. The next part of this scene would be to kiss Abed, wrap his hands around his neck, holding nothing back. That's what was supposed to happen but, Troy couldn't move. He was frozen in place with nothing to do but stare at Abed's hungry eyes. They gazed at each other, waiting for the other to make a move while the scene on the television unfolded before them. 

Troy was brought out of his daze when the credits started rolling and he turned his head to the screen reflexively. When he turned back to him, Abed was facing the television, his eyes focused on the TV a little too intensely and sitting a little bit farther from Troy than before.

1.

"Do you want to go to dinner with me? At the new restaurant a few blocks from here? It's supposed to be really good." Troy asked Abed in between his classes. He was fidgeting his hands and shifting his balance from one foot to the other. Abed accepted the invitation with a large smile on his face before quickly furrowing his eyebrow and scrunching his nose.

"Wait. Is this a date, or are we going as friends?" Abed started wringing his hands together, a hopeful look in his eye. "For the um, miscommunication trope." Abed rarely tripped on his words.

"As-as friends." Troy couldn't meet his eyes. "That's what you want, right?" 

"Yep." Abed replied lifting his hand up and giving him a thumbs-up. That large smile disappeared entirely as his lips formed a hard line. 

"Okay, I'll pick you up at your dorm at 7 and then we can walk there together." Troy said. Abed just nodded, leaving them to stand in front of his classroom with a thick tension enveloping the air. "Cool, okay." Troy swiftly turned and started walking off to his next class with thousands of thoughts filling his head all at once. _Did Abed want it to be a date?_

+1.

Before Troy could change his mind, he bought a bouquet of sunflowers (sunflowers don't have a scent) and was standing in front of Abed's dorm room at 6:55. All he had to do was knock on the door. Except he couldn't.Troy could not knock on the door for the life of him. His feet were stuck to the ground and his hands were stuck in midair, holding up the flowers to a closed door. He tried giving himself a pep talk, but nothing worked. All he could do was listen to the muffled sounds of a movie from within the room. He checked his watch. 6:58. The dinner is at 7 o'clock. Troy knew that he had enough time to ditch the flowers last minute and just go to dinner with Abed as friends, but a small part inside of him didn't want to. He had been avoiding asking Abed on a date for months and he didn't want to anymore. He didn't want to keep torturing himself with _what ifs_ and _maybes_. If Abed doesn't like him in that way then at least he'll know. That small part of him said _screw it_ , and decided to knock. 

"Troy?" Abed asked when he opened the door. His eyes kept glancing from Troy to the flowers he was holding in his hand. Abed was dressed in the same clothes from when Troy asked him to dinner this morning. A simple blue hoodie over a graphic t-shirt of a car. "What's happening?"

"Imsortakindainlovewithyou." He said it all in one breath, letting everything that has been building inside of him for months just spill out. He took a deep breath before explaining further. "I'm sorta kinda in love with you. Have been since forever. And when I asked you out, it was meant to be on a date, but I got scared. I'm not scared anymore." Troy smiled, more for himself than for Abed. "If you don't like me that's okay, we can just go as friends, but I don't want to hide this from you anymore. What do you think?"

Abed stared blankly at Troy, processing everything he said before a small smile appeared on his face. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay." 

All the doubt, anxiety, fear he had in his chest disappeared. He did it, he said it, and Abed was okay with it. A warm feeling spread from his chest to every part of his body like a blooming flower.

"Can I kiss you?" Abed asked. He tilted his head and stared into Troy's eyes. If it was anyone else, they wouldn't have noticed the apprehension visible in Abed's voice. That warm feeling became even more prominent than before. 

"Yeah."

They leaned forward at the same time, with Abed linking his hands behind Troy's neck. Troy was frozen again until Abed swiped his tongue against his lip and he melted into his embrace. He didn't know what to do with his hands at first so he was holding it in the air, before deciding to wrap it around Abed's waist. Abed kissed exactly how Troy expected: soft and sweet, but passionate, projecting all the feelings he couldn't convey onto his lips. Troy got the message. They reluctantly pulled apart, gasping for air. 

"I'm in love with you too, if that wasn't clear."

"No, it was." Troy couldn't help but stare at Abed's lips again, noticing how shiny and swollen they were. He did that. Troy did that.

Abed, noticing Troy's interest, moved his hands from the back of his neck to the collar of his shirt before pulling him into the room. 

"Wait, but-but what about dinner?" Troy asked slightly breathless.

"I'm a little hungry for something else." Abed replied, a smirk growing on his face.

Troy immediately lunged for his lips again, slipping his hands underneath his shirt and feeling the soft skin beneath it, desperate for more contact.

He let the sunflowers drop to the carpet before feeling for the door and quickly shutting it behind them.


End file.
